Nina B Therapy
Relationship Counselling and Sex Therapy
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|Posted on May 19, 2015 at 2:30 AM|
There has been much research to uncover what is the key to successful therapy. The resounding outcome is not the skills or techniques employed but the relationship between therapist and client.
Recently, I have been fortunate to go on a journey with a client. Of late discussions have been very positive and revolve around the successes he has been enjoying physically, within his relationship and with his personal growth.
There is no need for details on what the issues were that brought this gentleman to me, what is important is the recipe mixed together to effect these positive changes.
Self awareness –The ability for this client to delve deep into his emotions and past disappointments was the key him to be able to recognise his current core beliefs and ways in which can sabotage himself.
Understanding partner –This has been such a key part of the process as the client is a part of a couple. She agreed to meet with me once and is understanding of the process due to her own experiences with counselling. Her openness, patience and assistance with ‘sexercises’ have been crucial to continued therapy and the relationship.
Perseverance and fortitude –Many journeys take a few steps back every now and then, its how you recover that makes the difference.
Commitment to the process –When things haven’t gone to plan and there have been disappointments, every client has the choice to leave therapy instead of working the process. This client decided to continue to work at it and now he is at a stage in the process where work is turning into fun.
Recognising small successes – One of the toughest parts is change the way we think which is so automatic that we don’t even realise we do it. When these thought processes are negative then being able to see the small successes can be hard, but they accumulate making the big success.
Managing expectations -It would be lovely to wave magic wands and have change be immediate. Recognising that nothing happens without effort was something I didn’t have to impress upon this client.
Continued momentum to avoid relapse –This client feels the want to continue the momentum of his success and asked how to do that. Recognising that without continued effort, which will eventually become effortless, the chance of relapse is there.
Yes, the relationship with the therapist is important, but these elements absolutely can indicate how close a client will get to their desired outcomes.
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