Couples Counselling and Sex Therapy

Darwin, Northern Territory based Relationship Counsellor and Sex Therapist    

Sexual dysfunction in Men is common and treatable in most cases. It is important to look at biological as well as psychological issues which may be affecting you. Below are some typical issues I have experienced in my practice.

This article and personal story is a great insight for porn use. It may be helpful for you.

The use of the term Porn addiction has been contentious in recent years, however a study done in 2016 showed that viewing porn has a impact on the reward centre of the brain. It lights up the same areas as heroin or alcohol. So while we cannot say porn is addictive because it is not a substance we consume, we can say 'problem porn behaviour' as it results in us acting on our impulses and activating the reward centre.


Premature Ejaculation

Could this be you?
The International society of sexual medicine defines early ejaculation as:
“. . . a male sexual dysfunction characterized by ejaculation which always or nearly always occurs prior to or within about one minute of penetration, and the inability to delay ejaculation on all or nearly all penetrations, and negative personal consequences, such as distress, bother, frustration and/or the avoidance of sexual intimacy."

Many men overcome premature ejaculation with experience and an innate ability to relax. The key here is whether or not the issue is causing you distress or issues in your relationship. PE can be experienced as life long, acquired and relational. The most common factor influencing ejaculation is performance anxiety and over sensitivity. Medications have also been known to affect ejaculation. Recent studies have shown some hereditory links.  

Techniques such as the "Stop start method" have been very useful and effective in the past. However, if the technique is not applied correctly it can frustrate those not gaining success. A combination of methods including practical, mental, toys, creams or partners help ensure the best success.

(Disclaimer : I do not benefit financially from this)
performance anxiety erection problems


Erectile dysfunction (ED)

Could this be you?
The American Psychiatric Association (APA) defines ED as a "persistent lack of erection rigid enough for penetrative intercourse for 6‐12months (could be acquired or life long)."
ED is an excitement phase dysfunction. It is bound to happen at least a few times during a mans lifetime. The reasons for the occurrence of ED are numerous. Physiological factors need to be assessed. Medications affect the ability to get and maintain an erection, most commonly, anti depressants, blood pressure and diabetic medications.
The mind is a powerful thing has been proven to play a role in a mans ability to become aroused. Depression, performance anxiety, life changes, stress, relationship problems and lack of sufficient stimulation may be a few reasons. The relationship between a man, his penis and his mind can be negotiated effectively with the right techniques and patience. 


Delayed or Inhibited Ejaculation

Could this be you?

This is a less common issue affecting the abilty for men to orgasm. This dysfunction is often confusing as the there is the fact the person can gain an erection and continue to perform for a long period time. Tempered with the frustration of no release or orgasm and some partners who would like shorter encounters. Relationships can at time suffer as the non suffering partner feels they must not be attractive or skilled enough to be able to get their lover to orgasm and there can be too much focus on their own satisfaction and orgasm.


Some other male sexual problems

  • Male Sexual Pain
  • Low Desire ( see Couples section)
  • Coping with disability or surgery.

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